So grown up!

I've been attempting to clear out my phone to make space to download the iOS 7 update (I know I know, I'm the last person in existence to do this). In the process I had to send myself 50+ videos and upload even more pictures to snapfish and email (I'm crazy I know but you can't be too careful) 

I ended up watching a lot of the videos. Insane. Literally insane as to how much Charlotte has grown and changed over the last 18 months! 

It is so hard to believe that the toothless little five lb infant is now my toddler who is walking, talking and has a mouthful of teeth. 

I feel like I'm in a country song, literally in a blink of an eye Charlotte has grown up. She's so independent. She is exploring the world around her and learning new things every day. The amount of knowledge she takes in on a daily basis astounds me. She is so smart, sweet and pretty. 

My heart aches because I know ill never get these (or those earlier) moments back. Time goes by so fast it is so hard to remember every detail and savor every moment. 

I think that's what is so hard for me. I get lost in the day to day too often. I make it a point each and every day to do nothing but take it on. Tune out everyone and everything but Charlotte and just enjoy our time together. 

These moments are the times I most love and most hate being a single mom. I know I know I'm a huge contradiction. That word does basically sum me up as a whole. 

I love it because I don't have to share those special moments with anyone, it's just me and Charlotte. I know that we have a special bond that she doesn't share with anyone else. Don't  get me wrong she has so many other people in her life she also has special bonds with, but they aren't the same. There's something special about mother daughter time, there really is, and I am blessed that I get EXTRA mother daughter time, it's amazing. 

What makes me sad, is that I don't have anyone to share the day to day things with. Those little nuances that make Charlotte Charlotte. I'm the only person in the entire world who knows 3:00 am Charlotte (she's not super pleasant, but she is extra cuddly). Some days when she days little things or learns new things I look around expecting someone to be there. It's very hard not to have someone to share those things with, or have someone to bounce ideas off of. 

I think that's what makes me such an over sharer. I want as many people to know the amazing Charlotte! Her likes, dislikes, wants, needs. So next time I'm going down memory lane I can say "hey remember when she did...." 

The last 18 months have had many many downs for me, but it has also had its up. The biggest up (which outweighs ALL the downs) is that Charlotte has only had 18 months of ups. She is a very happy little girl, who has experienced many fun things and has many people in her life who love her. I try to make each day a special adventure for her and plan to do that for the rest of her life, no matter what our circumstances. 

Each day is a gift and will be gone quicker than it should. Everyday I like to remind myself how important it is to put my phone down, stop working, quit complaining, stop worrying so much and just enjoy the moment. I'm so happy I've been successful at this (not as often as I'd like, but hey I'm human and have to make a living haha) I urge everyone I know to do the same. Seriously, it goes by so quickly!

How did this: 

Turn into this: 

I feel like I took a quick nap and the transformation happened. So weird, but I'm sure every parent out there feels the same. And that's what I love about this blog and my excessive Facebook picture sharing, I love when you all leave comments on my pictures and satuses and blog posts. The messages and emails sent are great, it makes me feel less alone (and totally normalizes this parenting thing, everyday I think I'm the only parent dealing with something and it's confusing and scary, and everyday you all prove me wrong and I feel normal again) seriously being a parent is hard so it's great to learn and hear from all of you! , and I love sharing charlottes journey with you all, it means more to me than you'll ever know! 

Little swimmer!

Swim class is back in full swing! We've already had three classes this session! She does great in the water! She really is developing some skills! She will kick when you say kick and has begun working on the arms part, she loves to splash the water! 

My little water baby really takes after me, I love the water so much and I'm glad she does too! 

Face maker

Every time I get Charlotte out of the car she sticks her tongue out at me and laughs and laughs! She does this because I always make funny faces at her through the window while I'm getting gas or before daycare in the morning and she laughs and laughs. 

Today when I opened the car door and she was sticking her tongue out and smiling I waited a moment before taking her out of her carseat, and I kissed her asked her to do that forever, because its so cute, and our little thing. 

I wanted to take that moment in and remember it always. Her sweet face and innocent smile. 

It's amazing watching them grow up, but it's also heartbreaking and scary quite frankly. Everyday I have those mother worries, I want her to be this happy forever, I never want her to know heartbreak or despair, never want her to go hungry, just want her to be happy always. 

I had to post today because its important to remember the little things! Charlotte and I do a lot of fun things together, and while I love watching her have fun, I also love these little moments, these things we share, I wanted to capture this moment so I will always remember it, especially on those nights she keeps me up or on those days filled with tantrums. 

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to, 
Your dreams stay big, your worries stay small, 
You never need to carry more than you can hold, 
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to, 
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too, 
Yeah, this, is my wish.

Irvine Nature center

If you've never been to the Irvine nature center it's a real treat and the price is affordable because its free! Charlotte and I were blessed with amazing weather this weekend so went to check it out. 

Inside they have lots of animals to look at and lots of things to touch and learn about! They also have a cool party room and do birthdays there, taking note for the future! 

Outside there is even more fun stuff to do! The trails are awesome, we did a short flat one with no hills, perfect if you have a toddler, or want to go with an off road stroller. On the trail they had a little aviary where we got to see a hawk and an owl, also an opossum but it was creepy haha. There was a beautiful overlook with a gazebo and beehives so you could check out the bees. 

The real gem is the outdoor classroom, where they encourage you to get messy with nature! There's a place to play in the  sand and dirt, trees to climb and even a musical area! 

Charlotte had so much fun! She loved the walking trail and even picked up a leaf or two to take with us. It was a lot of fun to watch her explore the outdoor classroom! She made mud pies and stirred them up with a stick (she may have even eaten some dirt haha) she dug in the sand, snacked at pint sized picnic tables and climbed tree stumps! 

This place is definitely worth checking out! It really encourages natural play and imagination and gives kids a chance to look at animals up close! It's great for kids of all ages!

15 Months!

Ok, so she is 16 months now, but in September she had her 15 month check-up with our favorite doctor, Dr. Otto. 

He said she is growing beautifully! She weighed in at 18lbs! So hard to believe she was just 5 lbs when I brought her home from the hospital.  She has grown and changed so much! She loves her bracelets and accessories, she likes to dress herself now, and will often bring you two different shoes to wear.  She loves to walk and swing.  She also loves slides and sitting down (I know its weird, but she loves little chairs, I put one on her Xmas list, so I hope santa brings her one, she will climb in and out of her chair over and over again in the backyard)

She is extremely loving.  She blows kisses to everyone, including strangers haha.  She loves to be independent and won't hold hands when walking unless the terrain is rocky, and then her little hand will reach out for mine and its so sweet.  Even when she is running and being independent she always looks back to make sure I am watching.  She loves to run around the backyard and will come over to where I am to give me a kiss and then run around again.  She loves animals. ALL animals.  She pets them and kisses them and still runs around saying "hi dog".  She loves to go to the zoo to see all the animals.  She says "moo" when she sees the cows. 

Charlotte loves to eat.  She will try anything once, but if she doesn't like it she will definitely let you know.  I gave her ketchup to try with her French fries, she dipped them in, tried it, hated it, so she turned the French fry around and ate from the other end.  She is smart like that, a problem solver.  She looks at all of the food presented to her and carefully chooses what piece she wants.  She loves grapes and blueberries, those are her current favorite fruits.  She loves mini bagels, with almost any spread. 

She says a lot of words, and the words she doesn't know she tries to say.  She says hi, bubble, GG, mama, da (for dad), dog, duck, moo, bird, hot (she will even blow on her food after she says hot, sometimes she says hot and blows on it just for funsies, like with a popsicle).  She signs very well too, she even puts a couple signs together.  She can sign, more, eat, sleep, diaper, drink, cookie, and her all time favorite thing to sign is please.  She is working on signing help, but she struggles with it and would rather just make a noise and sign please. 

She loves to "help" and is quite the copy cat.  She likes to put on makeup like me, and if anyone is painting their nails she will INSIST hers get painted too, but walks away after only one foot is done, so they are forever different colors.  She likes to put things in and out of the dishwasher and help cook but stirring and adding ingredients.  She likes to help dress herself and help change her diaper.  She will try to do everything by herself, but struggles which can sometimes frustrate her. 

She has started the "tantrum" phase.  She freezes and cries when she does not get what she wants, but after a few seconds of ignoring and letting her know what she wants is not a choice and providing her with things that are choices she calms down right away. 

If you're still reading, this is her update and I hope you liked it and know Charlotte a little bit better if you don't get to see her as much as I do haha.  Charlotte is amazing, I am so blessed to be her mother.  I love keeping this blog (even though I have been neglectful recently).  I will always remember these amazing times with her that I am fortunate enough to have, and I can't wait until she is old enough to read the posts and see all the amazing adventures she's had since birth.  I know there are so so many more to come! I have many many more posts and will get to them soon, but for now it is off to bed with me, Charlotte will be up soon and I like to get in some rest before she wakes, but it is easy to sleep when I feel so blessed. 

Renn Fest!

One of my favorite fall things to do is visit the Maryland Renaissance Festival! So we braved it the day after our awesome aquarium trip.  I was quite nervous because I have never been to such a big event with her on my own when she could walk, but luckily we met a big group of friends there so I had extra sets of eyes!

So have you ever seen those kids with the backpack leashes on them? Well I used to totally judge those people, seriously judge them.  I would say the things like "how could they ever do that?" Well, I do not have said backpack leash, but I totally understand where those people are coming from.  I don't think those are for me (yet haha), but there will be no more judging, kids can run, and they can run fast haha

Overall it was super fun! Here is the dilemma I face, and if anyone still reads my blog, I'm open to suggestions! So events like this I need to take her stroller, it's a lot of walking and uneven ground, and it also is good to be able to contain her, but I also like to let her walk around, but it so hard to chase her, push the stroller haul all of her belongings through a sea of people dressed like beer wenches and nobles. 

Charlotte and I had a blast on the big slide, that had to be both our favorite parts! She even sat in her stroller and watched a magic show.  She ate a turkey leg and fried mac and cheese and played on the playground.  What a great day we had.  We will definitely go back.  Going out and about to these things on my own with her is challenging, but always worthwhile.  I never ever ever want her to miss out on anything because it is more difficult for me to take her places without someone else there, so it is always worth it.  We both have a blast, I have a blast watching her have a blast haha

 

Isn't this how you read your maps?

Aunt Jenna Gets Married!

Charlotte's aunt Jenna got Married on September 7th! It was a fantastic day! The weather was amazing, and the wedding was beautiful! Jenna and mom did a great job picking everything out and they made almost everything, including the flowers!

Charlotte was such a joy to have at the wedding, she loved running around the Ravens field! Charlotte and I were both so honored to be a part of such an amazing and wonderful day! Charlotte loves her aunt Jenna and cousin Holden, and uncle Andrew SO MUCH!

The Ravens Locker Room:

Two of the most important ladies in my life:

 

I LOVE this picture:

                                   The Happy Family!! How beautiful is Jenna?!

 

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